out of energy

I wish I had more energy. There are so many things I want to do, and I've been getting nowhere this week. If I really wanted to make excuses, I guess I could blame part of it on the flu -this has been the worst day of ot so far, had to give in after about half of todays work was done. (Now I have to do the rest tomorrow, so not looking forward to that) I haven't been able to go running because of the flu, and I miss that a lot. Also had to skip practice, when I would so have liked to go through some of the things from last weekend's course. To only sit on my ass and work (write) is so hard when I'm too tired to focus, my brain doesn't feel properly connected (thanks to the flu) and at the same time I can't do any of the things that normally make my day. On the other hand I remember already struggling with (and writing about) motivational problems before last weekend, so I should probably just skip the excuses then.
I should probably try to get back to my artwork even if I officially "don't have the time". Especially as I know this can sometimes work as a kickstart for me... And after a while, when I haven't, I'll feel empty. Just have to get to it, I guess. I wonder why I still so rarely prioritise my art, even though I once took on to make it my profession? I have fought myself more than a couple of times about this, but so far neither side of me has ever won.

update on the weekend

I had the greatest weekend, event though sometimes it seems it takes longer and longer to fully recover after the courses. The first two days after my return I pretty much spent reloading on calories, trying to beat a flu before it really hits me (seems to be failing) and being generally ineffective. And once again, just as after the June course last year, I know that I absolutely have to got to Summer school again in august. So I guess you could say that I'm working on that now.

I've also been transcribing my course diary, to be able to share it. This has been the first course that I've actually done a diary on, and it did start well but...  I never managed to finish it, as once the course got going there were both the socials and the tiredness from practice. So the first practices were documented in great detail but then it just trailed off... But I still know I learned from the parts that I did write, because it had me go through everything again in my mind and analyze it at least to some extent. I think I'll try do the same thing again next time I attend a course. And now that I think of it, I wonder if my main use of this blog isn't too far from that either...

Now, if I could only get back to reality, too...

weekend off

I have had a rough week or so. For no particular reason, as I know of, just lack of inspiration and overall energy. I hope that this weekend's karate course will be just the break I need. I'll be leaving for Estonia tomorrow morning, and even though I'm really excited about it, I still haven't even started packing, and my home loke like hell just broke loose. Guess that's what I'll be doing tonight then.
I'm so looking forward to this. Simply being off work would be good enough for me right now, but ttending one of the best karate courses of the year is quite a good bonus! See you on the other side.

on exercise

Sometimes I wonder if I'm a hyperactive. It's like my brain worked by dynamo, some dayss it's just impossible to sit still and focus for more than the shortest moments. For a ewhile now, I've been running to soothe this, but recently I've been looking for alternatives to running, because however much I enjoy it (not to mention the amazing feeling afterwards) I've come to realise that it takes too much energy. Or , to put it like this: I also need something less intensive, something that burns fewer calories, as I now (and I know this might sound like a luxury problem to some) seem to burn too much, and I'm not interested in loosing weight. I have no plans to quit running (I love it too much!) but I'm looking intosimple yoga- and/or fitness exercices to do at home - less calory-burning and also less time-consuming.

Last night I did some repetitions of a simple yoga exercise (don't remember the name of it) that we've sometimes done during karate warmups, and I felt it worked quite well for me. Got my body a bit warmer, my mind calmer and also opened up my stiff back nicely. And I did manage to return to work shortly after, and got things done. So I'd count that as a small success!

I'll definitely be trying more of something similar. And to just do a couple of exercises doesn't take too much time, either.

life advice from someone who knew how to

I don't post links to other sites on here very often, at least without further comment, but I'll make an exception today, as this is so just worth a read: 

http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2012/03/16/10-lessons-from-einstein/

I am happy to recommend (but doubt that I really have to) the rest of Paulo Coelhos blog, too.

on karate practice and making plans

Finally attended karate practice again on Thursday, after a break of several weeks. And it was good! I have really missed karate. Some muscles still hurt today, and it's Sunday... My practice motivation is definitely back, and if it wouln't be I just have to think of the upcoming course in Estonia. This course is the biggest Finnish/baltic happening of the year, and I wouldn't miss it for the world!

I've been doing some planning for this summer, and I can already say it looks like it will be better than last year! The only downside is (once again) my personal economy. I still havent got myself a better (paid) job, but I keep getting declines. Hence, the planning.
Speaking of big plans, I had planned to spend this entire day writing but, suprprise surprise, ended up cleaning my appartment instead. Well, at least it was much needed, it was seriously not a day too late. So a failed plan, but for the better. I will not feel horrible to come home tonight.

Death from cuteness

Here's my belated music video of the week. So, it only took this long before I started posting kittyvideos... A warning: death from cuteness may occur...